Unlike, it seems, everyone else in the world, I really don’t give a two shits about the royal wedding. Yes it’s a big deal for some people, but for me it just seems like a waste of time and money. I have decided though, considering that it’s apparent that mainstream media is going to throat-rape me with coverage at every possible moment (much like they did with the Black Eyed Peas), I shall embrace the opportunity to make fun of the concept, rather than be a Royal wedding scrooge and deny their complete existence (much like I did with the Black Eyed Peas). This viral from T-Mobile is cool.
As you know, I love side projects, and this is just one I’ve been working on. Presenting: The Guerra Twins! Consisting of me and my twin brother Lionel. We’ve taken a lot of inspiration from South African kids dance duo Locnville, because we totally love them. Let me know what you think of us…
I’m back. I wonder how many times I’ve said that in my, well lets be honest ‘less than admirable’ blogging career. You see I’m very good at starting things, very good. I’ve started a hella lotta blogs. I even considered starting a new one tonight, perhaps Tumblring it, or *Insertnameoftrendynewblogenginehere*ing the fuck out of it even. But then, that would probably not be good, because then I would just have another dead blog in the wasteland of cyberspace (for lack of a better term at this time of night) that would one day be picked apart by Heat magazine in a quiet month when they’re looking for dirt on me when the scandal of Katy Perry, Katie Melua and I breaks. Yes we’re together, and yes “9 Million Bicycles in Beijing has a totally different meaning to what you think.
So yeah, despite the fact that ol’ mattsuttner.wordpress hasn’t been so consistently looked after, I will carry on with her in the hope that one day I will pull my finger out of my bottom and actually update this properly. So with that preamble out of the way, I have 2 tidbits for you.
I’m going to be a dad! This is Ntabiseng, and that little nipper inside we’re going to be calling Ja Rule (on his granddaddy’s [her side] request).
Obviously we’re going to get married but we don’t want it to be a shotgun wedding, and I’m still trying to convince Katy and Katie that we need a third woman (it’s hard). We also figure since we’re not in a rush then we might as well allow little Ja Rule to come to the wedding, this way we have a cheap ring -bearer. By the way, this photo was taken the other night when we went to Manhatten, as you can see she was appropriately dressed.
How lame is this fucking guy?
Aside from his other (shall we quote Nana Venter and say) ticks, of which I would say there are many, he’s playing Dance Dance Revolution on his PC?!?? With his fingers?! If you don’t know what Dance Dance Revolution is, there is a clue in the title. DANCE DANCE. I don’t know but there is something frightfully annoying about the way he is so ‘good’ at that game. I’ll admit that I’ve dabbled with DDR at arcades, like twice in my whole life, and I have a particular fondness for Guitar Hero which some might argue is a similar concept but you have to admit this guy is a LOOOOOOOOOSER. The cream of all of this for me is at the end when he breaks the shit out of his monitor, he tries to act all rock ‘n roll about it, suggesting his actions are awesome when in fact he’s more like Lennie breaking Curly’s wife’s neck ala Of Mice and Men. What a tool. Anyway if you wanna know how I think DDR should be played lookie:
Thats it from me, see you in another 4-6 months when I decide to blog again. If you want more consistent Suttnerific updates, and event if you don’t….
I found this old video of my 21st Birthday party, it was on the roof of the colloseum hotel in PTA… hehe, we were never allowed back after this one, what a party! 🙂
After watching this again, I decided to google ‘Matt Suttner’s birthday party’ (as one does) to see what comes up 🙂 Below is one of the results 😀 I don’t…. THINK this was my birthday party, although it could have been… people tend to buy lots of tequila on my birthday, so maybe…
Anyway, the next thing you hear from me will be my very first Podcast entitled The Matt Suttner Show! make sure you’re one of the first to get it, listen on your ipod at the dentist and 0.4-0.7% pain decrease guaranteed!